The "Itch"

How many of you out there have ever felt the "itch"? 
There really is only one way to cure it.  Unfortunately it is a way bigger commitment then just going to buy some cream for a normal itch.  The "itch" I am talking about is the itch to add more children to your family!  I found the blog below which I wrote back in 2013 but never published.  Funny how after so much time the "itch" still hasn't gone away!!

I am a huge researcher and love to make lists so when I asked myself if we were done adding kids I went to the books and the computer to find an answer.  Yes, I have looked at all of the lists online stating how you know you are done having children.  Most of them are compiled of reasons that would cause me to say "Yes!  I am done with babies!":
  1. You are done changing diapers
  2. You value your sleep and can't do without it
  3. You got rid of all of your baby stuff
  4. You don't want to be pregnant again
  5. You just know you are done
But that list doesn't really apply to what I had in mind in how to expand our family.

After we had Jackson people always asked when we were going to have more kids.  After awhile that became the most hurtful question anyone could ask me and thankfully people stopped asking.  Infertility is not fun. 

There is a happy ending in that we adopted the perfect child and then had a surprise miracle child to top it all off!  Funny how after we had Tyce people never asked when or if we are going to have more children.  I think it is because people automatically assume that pregnancy is the way to build a family so they didn't dare ask. (and to be fair, I kind of had my hands full with two little ones 12 months apart!)

Four years ago when the little ones were 1 and 2 years old we were talking very seriously about adopting again.  You see for us getting pregnant again really wasn't the way we wanted to go to expand our family.  Conceiving and pregnancy is a scary thing for the both of us and we didn't want to go through that again. But more then that, there are so many ways to grow your family and adoption has been such a blessing for us that there was no question about wanting to do it again.

I did all of the research with agencies and countries and signed up for all of the newsletters.  I talked with other parents who had adopted from my country of choice since Guatemala had shut down their doors to international adoption.  I was all set to go and then 2008 happened.  What a mess!  Unfortunately, adopting takes some money and international adoption takes even more!

We decided to sit on it and wait.  That is when refugee foster care came into play.  We began to expand our family through foster care.  It was a huge blessing and we have loved every minute, but each time a child moves on it is difficult and selfishly I want to keep most of the kids that pass through our doors!  So the question of how do we know if our family is complete comes to mind yet again!

I wish there was a list or a how to or book or something that I could refer to that would point me in the right direction!  My most often "go to" doesn't always answer my questions in my expected time frame or maybe God is answering my questions and I just need to listen harder!


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