The Doctor gave me an "Aha"

For about a month I have heard consistently from others how much "J" has changed.  It has been said that he is a completely different child since he came to live with us in October.  I have even said these words, but until today I don't think I really realized how much he really has changed!

"J" had a doctor's appointment today.  The last time we saw this particular doctor (who I love by the way) was at the beginning of November.  "J" and I did the whole down to a dry diaper thing, got weighed, measured, I expressed my concerns, and then we waited in that tiny room for the doctor.  I held "J" on my lap and he played with some beads that were build into the wall.

The doctor came in a few minutes later to see "J" sitting quietly and calmly on my lap.  He gave her a big smile and waved when she said hi.  The 3 year resident behind her who entered only got a stink eye from "J", but I think that was because he has a beard. :)

The doctor sat and talked with me about the typical doctor stuff.  Abruptly during our conversation she turned to the resident and told him how she couldn't believe this was the same child she had seen in November.  She told him how "J" wouldn't sit for more then two seconds even in a lap.  He wouldn't let people hold him.  He was running all over the room pulling things down and ripping things apart! 

I wouldn't say that I had forgotten that experience, but it had slipped my mind and probably for good reason!  By this time in our appointment in November, I had shed as much clothing as I could get away with and still had drops of sweat running down my hairline and back as I chased after this now docile child!  I had had a bag full of toddler treats, milk, books, toys that lit up and made noise, and diapers.  I was on the floor whipping out one thing after another to try to engage "J" and keep him out of trouble! The doctor even ended up on the floor to try to examine "J"!  He screamed when he was to be measured and went wild eyed when we had to hold him still to check his ears.  He struggled and squirmed when it was time to bring him back to the car and he screamed half the way home in his car seat!

Today, 3 months later, I looked down at the things I brought in to his appointment and was shocked at the difference.  I was carrying my every day purse with a diaper and some wipes shoved in it.  That was it!  "J" was not running like a crazy child around the small room.  He was sitting calmly.  He engaged with the people in the room.  He let them hold him (with his eye on me at all times).  He sat on the examining table and turned his head when asked.  He was curious about the instruments, but listened when he was told no.  He put his arms in his shirt sleeves and allowed himself to be dressed without a fuss.  As we left the office he held my hand and we walked through the doors.  He waved good bye and blew kisses to all of the nurses and doctors with a huge smile!  He pushed the button for the elevator with my help and didn't let go of my hand while we walked until I picked him up to carry him outside.

"J" is a different child!  I had seen changes at home, but when you deal with it day in and day out sometimes it takes an "aha" moment before it really hits you that it is true!  He is still a busy little boy, but his activity level is more appropriately channeled now! 

I am overjoyed at this change!  I can't believe I made it through all of that chaos and I can't imagine what life must have been like for him before he came to us to warrent such behavior.  I'm so happy for this little "aha" moment today because after nap time when we hit the "witching hour" and he won't let me put him down while I try to make dinner or while he takes one of the kids' pieces of school work or sacred toys, sits under the table, rips it up, and feeds pieces to the dog, I will need to remember that things could be much worse! 


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